Sunday, 20 November 2016

Me, Being Mummy: Weeks 73-80

Me to Father Time: 'C'mon dude.... give a mum a break once in a while would you?!'.

Seriously. Time is not full of forgiveness, it just keeps on going and you have to either keep up or catch up. Which is exactly what I am doing here, with BB's 'weekly' update. I really am going to try and get back into doing a weekly post for him, I have been so busy keeping up with all of his developments (as well as all my own with this second pregnancy) that I have struggled to document them all in written form! But, my baby brain has clung to a few key moments so let me catch up and then I will keep up as of next week. Yes. So I will dammit!

Firstly, I am seeing signs that this marvellous 18 month old boy is going to be a complete chatterbox. Which, seeing as both myself and his father are well known for our conversational abilities, is hardly at all surprising to be honest. He is piecing together the first fundamental basics such as 'hello', 'bub- bye' and the precursor to a proper thank you which is 'ta'*. Not only is it super cute to hear his voice using these new words but to witness them being used in their proper context makes you puff up with pride... like an over zealous puffer fish.

* Somehow; 'ta' sometimes gets swapped for 'bum'. Trying not to laugh when handing something over to be met with a sincere 'bum' is extremely difficult. Must note to keep straight face at all times.

Parks and open flat grassy or paved areas are now my friend. I've taken BB on brief jaunts to the swings before and he entertained the whole idea as best as he could when he was just enough able to perch awkwardly in the seat and smile at being gentle swung to and fro. Nowadays, he is toddling about all over the place and taking a real interest in everything he comes across. Nothing like seeing the pure joy on your child's face when they discover something new and amazing! He spent 25 minutes admiring a concrete spherical shaped bollard on a shopping trip I made last week. So much so that he was devastated when I had to shepherd him back to the car.

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Which leads me to my next observation... we are experiencing a hell of a lot more of his temper! This placid, almost completely angelic ball of putty has started to form opinions and attitude. He is asserting himself with tears and whimpers, sometimes even with physical demonstrations such as flinging oneself on the floor and rolling about in a bereft fashion... like some sort of thespian actor who has just found the storyline he's portraying a little bit too much to handle.

It can be hard not to chuckle, and on a certain level, I am pleased he is developing his sense of self and feels he can express and assert how he feels about things, not to mention that this is the only way he can really do so at the moment until his speech truly does catch up. But when he is crying hot tears and pitching deafening screams about having to leave behind a ball of concrete acting as a bollard, and onlookers are nervously laughing in a bid to empathise with what is happening to me on a grown up/parental level, I simply have to mentally and emotionally lock down, crack on and fight the resentment of his outburst shining the social spotlight on us for all to see. 

I ignore tantrums and carry on, business as usual. I neither interact nor encourage the behaviour by giving it any attention. Once it passes I praise the fact it is over and then distract away from what has happened. For now, it is all I can do and I have to just remind myself that it is all just part of this journey called 'parenthood'.

I am embracing doing more activities and overcoming elements of my anxiety more and more as well. Sounds so cliche but I really am proud of my little steps in the right direction. For example, we regularly attend an activity morning at least once a week to socialise and burn off more energy and as tedious as it can be following BB around in circles whilst he chases a ball for an hour, the happiness he shows from going along with his pink  cheeks that glow from all the action once the hour is up, just humbles me into keeping on and not letting social anxiety stop me and in turn, stop him, from enjoying things. 

I'd love to try and speak to other mums but the reality is that it's just not possible. A lot of them sit and chat and let their kids run around all over the place because it's a contained area but I feel too anxious to be able to approach things that way. Not only because I'm watching for any accidents that may happen (kids collide with one another all the time!) but also because I have to mediate between BB and other kids almost every minute because one minute you're toddling along fine and the next minute can result in the devastating scenario of having one's ball/toy/soft play item snatched from under one's nose. Or oneself can become the snatcher. I also secretly love watching the joy on his face as he darts about and if that means that for now I have to pass up a bit of chit chat then I'm fine with it.

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Mealtimes I am not fine with though. I bloody hate them. I inwardly dread each one and offer up yummy food only to have it flung across the room by way of experimentation. Dinner time is more successful as by that time of day he is actually really hungry, but breakfast and lunch get mucked about with daily. If it wasn't for the fact that the floor gets such a beating and I get so demoralised having my cooking rejected then I wouldn't mind so much. I have to just remind myself that he will not be a full fledged adult flinging his chicken curry across the dining room and that a lot of it is down to figuring out how to feed himself. Which he is actually starting to do (in a semi proper fashion) nowadays. It ultimately boils down to me feeling like my efforts are rejected followed by watching my clean floors and walls and surfaces get splattered with all manner of food graffiti. I'd put down plastic sheeting if I thought there was any point but the kid has actually got a good arm on him and, therefore, a good ranges. Cleaning wipes are my friend though!

Sleeping is another hit and miss scenario. We get glimmers of hope on the odd night or two where he sleeps from 7pm till 5/6am and myself and PB exchange sleepy, hopeful glances and exclaim phrases such as 'THAT was a good run!' or 'He slept through!' only to then be back on a run where we are up changing and resettling him once or twice a night. It's by no means as grim as it could be, and the beaut of a kid is rarely up before 7.30/8am, so we have upsides, but 18 months of broken sleep is gruelling. Then again, it's probably best we don't get too used to snoozy bliss because come March time we will be starting it all over again with BB2!

Yaaaay.....


So happy to be up to speed on BB1`s weekly updates now! Look out for them every week on Wednesdays!

See Me, Being Mummy: Weeks 60 - 72 for BB's last update. 


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18 comments:

  1. Haha the sphere bollard! We had the exact same thing the other week, and had a full on meltdown, grabbing the bollard and clinging to it for his life's worth for a good 10mins in the middle of a crowded street! Apparently terrible twos comes at 18m now! #dreamandsparkle

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    1. What is it with the whole bollard thing?! I'm like 'just let it go...why get so upset?' Lol! Nice to know it's not just me and mine! I've heard about the TT's hitting early... should rename it the 'mean 18s' or something like that and not fool us into thinking we have 6 months of peace and innocent cooperation left! Thank you for commenting lovely Xx

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  2. I'm sorry I did have to laugh at the food throwing, but one of my daughter's would do this when she'd had enough. Enjoy the toddler years #dreamandsparkle x

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    1. Lol! No worries, I have to laugh as well or else I'll just cry. How do people get by with all white interiors?? I will endeavour to enjoy and embrace it all... along with several brands of cleaning products. Thank you for stopping by :) xxx

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  3. Goodness, the first several months, then years, can be SO taxing on parents, emotionally and physically. Being a parent is a tremendously demanding job and you're often tackling it when sleep deprived to boot. Nevertheless, as a Mom to two teen, young men, the years pass all too quickly. I'm so glad I was able to take a step back sometimes (in the middle of a crying bout or near nervous breakdown, LOL!) and enjoy the fun and wonder and beauty of our children. Kids are definitely a handful but they're blessings, too! Visiting you from the #dreamandsparkle linky!

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    1. You're so right... my OH and I were looking at old pictures on FB and parenting has aged us so much already!lol. But yes, they are blessings and the teenage years come all too soon. I try to remember that when I feel I am going spare! Thank you for reading and commenting on my post, I really appreciate it xoxo

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  4. Oh the sleep is so hard to get through isn't it! Meal times were never a joy for us either, but I think we've worked them out now she's six so it does get better! Thanks so much for joining us at #DreamandSparkle

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    1. Sleep deprivation is probably the hardest thing about parenthood for me at the moment.The amount of sleep I've had instantly sets how I will act and feel so 18 months in I am feeling pretty worse for wear but then its AMAZING how much we can accomplish on little amount of sleep. Same goes for eating too really. Heres to when they turn 6!Am glad you're over that hump with your daughter. See you on the next linky!xoxo

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    2. Sleep deprivation is probably the hardest thing about parenthood for me at the moment.The amount of sleep I've had instantly sets how I will act and feel so 18 months in I am feeling pretty worse for wear but then its AMAZING how much we can accomplish on little amount of sleep. Same goes for eating too really. Heres to when they turn 6!Am glad you're over that hump with your daughter. See you on the next linky!xoxo

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  5. I did laugh at 'bum' being used for 'ta' They come out with some funny stuff sometimes. I totally empathise with the sleeping and eating issues. My now 6yr old didn't sleep more than two hours at at time until he was 14 months, and it was very slow to improve after that - I was a zombie for a long time. These days he sleeps 7-7, and even the smoke alarm won't wake him. And now my second doesn't think food is remotely important, at all. She seems to survive on pasta, olives and fresh air. Ah well, she's happy :-) #dreams&sparkle

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    1. Lol! It's nice to know I'm not alone in the struggle.... Bloody well feels like it at the 4am mark though, when you debate if it's worth going back to sleep or if it's better to just get up and crack on with washing/tidying/work etc! Gives me hope that we will reach 12 hours of pure, uninterrupted slumber too.... 7-7 is perfect! And pasta and olives sound like very healthy options to be obsessed with so your second is very wise! Main thing is their happiness right? Thank you so much for your comment lovely, it's given me hope!xx

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  6. This was so lovely to read! It is hard going isn't it when you have a toddler but also pregnant. I got pregnant when my first was 15 months and my god it was hard! The sleep deprivation is so very real when you're pregnant and all you want is to stuff your face with ice cream and pass out into a food coma, but you can't do it because we need to set an example haha the part about him mixing up bum and ta is fab! That is hilarious and I don't think I would be able to contain myself! Thank you for linking up to #prettyraw and hope to see you again next week :)

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    1. It is so much harder than I ever dreamt it would be!The tiredness both physically and mentally is ridiculous but it's amazing how resilient we are and how much we can keep on going even when it feels a bit impossible to! Oh I still stuff my face, I just don't quietly in the kitchen with the baby gate closed so he can't see me!haha! And the bum instead of ta thing is too funny... I have to laugh into my shoulder if it gets too much! Will see you on next week's linky!xx

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  7. My youngest is the same age as BB so I totally get where you are coming from. They certainly keep you on your toes but they are at that marvelous age, I constantly find myself watching in awe, fascination, pride and disbelief. Thanks for linking up with #MadAboutBlog.

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    1. I watch with all those emotions too, it really is a great time despite its hard bits... BB has just discovered climbing this week... just as you get used to things they pull another trick out of the hat don't they?! My pleasure, see you on the next linky!xx

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  8. Goodness me, you sound like the most perfect mum! I struggle to ignore tantrums, they're awful and public tantrums are the worst! Mealtimes aren't so bad at our house though, Little r takes after her mother and eats everything ;) #prettyraw

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    1. I envy you for your happy eater, I really struggle to keep a calm perspective around mealtimes! It's probably not helping the situation either which makes me cross at myself! Sadly, as much as I wish I was, I'm not perfect at all.haha! Tantrums get ignored and I keep calm on the surface but underneath I am wishing the ground to swallow us up and silently wishing everyone would go away!haha! Xxx

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  9. Thank you for joining us at #DreamandSparkle this week! Hope to see you on board again soon!

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