Friday, 20 January 2017

My Misguided View on Pregnancy

I was SO naive about pregnancy before I started a family. There I was, thinking that once I became 'with child', I would blossom and bloom, so amazingly and breath taking to behold that the world would slow down it's turning to catch a glimpse of me and my gorgeous bump and I would be treated like a small delicate flower.

I was looking forward to losing my temper with people for treating me as if I were fragile. I had visions of having cigarette smoke from across the street wafted out of my vicinity, in case I breathed in the fumes and harmed the precious babe in my belly. I envisaged people holding doors open for me... endless back rubs and foot rubs. I honestly practised lines in my head in preparation for situations, thinking my favourite of 'Tuh... I'm pregnant, not dying... don't worry about me!' would come into perfect use (along with an eye roll and a bat of the hand), possibly when I was trying to make the bed, open a door or pull out a chair to sit on.

I haven't used the line once. In a nutshell, people get used to you being pregnant. After the initial 'Wow!' factor, the fact that the baby is inside you and can only really be felt by you... kind of excludes everyone else from the club really doesn't it? People are busy, people are tired. You are not the pivotal axis of the planet after all.

Especially second time round. The novelty has completely worn off by then and your first basket of fruit from your loins has everyone distracted from the fact you are working on another. Lifting I've been spared a lot and I've been grateful to have that help, especially when it comes to having BB or shopping bags carried. But, on the whole, special treatment has been non existent. Back massages and foot rubs were also a perk in my head. Small price for creating an entire human from scratch. I've actually given more foot rubs  than received this second time round!

I also had this image (more so the first time round) of my appearance staying as myself, just with a bump attached. I pictured fuller boobs, a nice round bump, glowing skin and shiny hair.

What. A. Prat.

Cue dough like limbs, a massive globe in the front and two admittedly full boobs that will in time deflate and hit the dirt. Literally. I underestimated the back ache (our spines curve like a pretzel?!) and the puff of fluid retention. I had no idea your pelvis could become misaligned and make walking up the stairs or turning over in bed torture. I just looked forward to the magic of feeling a baby kicking inside me. Luckily, that magic is valid... and makes up for the pain!

Now, don't misunderstand me, I am not ungrateful, neither am I put out by reality. I am an independent woman who is also stubborn, hot of temper and very determined in nature... and that's without a shit load of hormones on top. I don't wish to be molly coddled and I don't want to be constantly treated like a princess either. Its simply that I had expected all of that stuff. I thought I would have to be cajoled into sitting down and forced into submission with a neck rub. I envisaged getting annoyed with people for treating me so carefully and for wanting to touch my beautiful bump. That I would feel suffocated. And ... its not the case at all. The world continues to spin at the same speed as ever. My groans and moans of aches and pains are met with a pat on the shoulder, I actually grab people's hands to try and share the magic of a kick and a toddler who wants his toy, that he's lost under the sofa, really doesn't get or give a shit that their sibling is curled around my bladder and head butting my cervix.

Just as well really, it is all preparation for what is to come and stops me from getting too comfy. After all, a newborn baby doesn't exactly bestow the princess treatment in abundance either do they? Ha!


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18 comments:

  1. LOL. The silly ideas we get in our heads.
    With my first baby I showed very little (until right near the end when I kind of exploded) but it was very disappointing that nobody knew I was pregnant unless I told them. So I got no treatment at all!
    Good luck with baby no 2
    #fortheloveofBlog

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    1. Thank you! Aww, I've heard of this happening to mums to be.. especially first time round. On the upside, your core muscles must have super human strength.lol! Can imagine it must have been so disappointing though. Thank you for your comment! xxx

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  2. Too true. And then we have the baby and discover all our ideas about parenting were completely wrong as well!!! #fabfridaypost

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    1. Haha! Precisely... things work out so very differently! Amazing how well we adapt though isn't it? And some things work out better than we expect too so I guess it is all a balancing act. Thank you for stopping by and commenting! xxx

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  3. Haha! Ahh I experienced the exact opposite. At work I was constantly being offered a seat, being told not to jump about with the kids (although I did end up in hospital that night so maybe that was wise advice!) and being told that it was best if I avoided a, b and c because I was pregnant. So frustrating! #blogstravaganza

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    1. So that sort of behaviour does exist?! I thought it was all in my head.lol. Bless you, it sounds frustrating on a whole different level. Jumping about with the kids is probably best avoided... am impressed you managed it though! Thank you for commenting :) xx

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    2. It was probably more for insurance purposes that they treat me that way ;-) Just visiting again for the #TuesdayTreasures linky

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  4. I was thought a lot of the same things when I found out I was pregnant with my first. I was wrong too, people are so quick to forget and things go back to normal, haha! When I got pregnant with number two it was even worse, it was like I wasn't pregnant until I went into labour and then people noticed! Thanks so much for linking up to #Blogstravaganza, it'd be great to see you again next week xx

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  5. Hahahaha this did make me laugh! My first pregnancy was wonderful - literally couldn't wait to do it all again. The second time round brought me down to earth with a beach ball sized bump, agonising heartburn and persistent morning sickness. Add to that a nearly three year old and nobody giving a rat's arse second time round. It was vile and I cried ������ #DreamsandSparkle

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  6. Great piece of writing! I admire you - as I too was so naive. The world doesn't stops just because you are pregnant and yet I so want it to stop because I am god dam pregnant - dam it! lol! Thanks for linking up with us on #FabFridayPost

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  7. "your first basket of fruit from your loins has everyone distracted from the fact you are working on another" haha that cracked me up. My first pregnancy was great. I have yet to make another human...still weighing my options. hehe Found you on Twinkly Tuesday.

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  8. Haha, yeh quite a few things came to a shock to me to. I got caught out with an incredibly bad case of SPD at 28 weeks because I didn't slow down. Nobody told me that could happen. If we ever have a second, like you, I'm under no illusions now... Hope the remainder of your pregnancy goes as smoothly as poss! #MarvMondays

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  9. Pregnancy definitely wasn't what I imagined it to be! The heartburn and indigestion was the killer for me. Loads of my hair fell out after I gave birth, and I am now weirdly allergic to kiwi fruits??! #TwinklyTuesday

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  10. Pregnancy is so hard. Once everyone has celebrated your pregnancy you are left to get on with it. Thanks for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

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  11. I think you have hit the nail on the head, the novelty soon wears off for people especially the second time around. I would however be demanding those foot rubs if I was you, they are a given right to pregnant ladies ! Thanks for linking up with #TuesdayTreasures

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  12. My third is due in just under 2 weeks and I'm so over being pregnant now! #twinklytuesday

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  13. I think when you're first expecting or have a new born you have all these ideals and they just never go to plan do they? #DreamandSparkle

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  14. My bf hates touching feet and has flat out told me when I become pregnant foot rubs are off the menu! #DreamandSparkle

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